Pretty when you cry
by slithermyfever
Summary: This story is about the start of an abusive relationship and how it ends. If ever It does.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello all! **

**So this is my very first fanfic going up, ****I hope some of you may genuinely enjoy it. It'll be an emotional one. There will be a lot of abuse in it, that'll eventually mount. **

**If any of type of abuse triggers you, I apologize, but you may wish to take your leave now. **

**Anywho, thank you kindly to anyone who decides to read!**

_**Fate always loses hold**_  
_**Like electric sparks in my heart**_  
_**Fate always loses hold**_  
_**Now be a good girl and do what you're told**_

"I do."

"—_I_ **do**."

You fixed me with a preternatural steady stare and the shaky, klutz in me prevailed but your arms arm weaved over my waist, holding me like a doll and I felt that familiar crosscurrent between us and knew that I was in thrall to you.

I leans in and give you a slow, sure kiss having a desire to prolong, as well as deepen it. "I love you." You mouthed then, with a smile so beautiful and sinfully perfect teeth.

"I love you, Edward." I stared at you for a heartbeat, your green eyes positively smoldering, and then you caught me by my hand and led me to our new life.

* * *

I admit I didn't envision as a young girl to be eloped at 18, I had other dreams. A big wedding, I was going to astound my friends in a gown so glamorous, my parents teary-eyed - that sort of thing.

But you pitched the idea and I didn't want to ruin a perfectly good thing, you looked absolutely breathtaking, your skin mottled with heat, our combined sweat and mingled smell. I was always the most docile with you after being freshly fucked and It is hardly straining the truth to say that I could never say no to your burning, powerful eyes.

After we retired to bed, I stared at my ring for an estimated hour. You remembered that my favorite stone was sapphire, it made me cry to think you spent a fortune on my ring when we barely had enough money from your bartender job and my unemployed status. And as I lay in that dark hour, balanced on the fulcrum of anxiety and anguish — I couldn't do away with my sudden urge to wake you.

I began to premeditate a way to convince you to return it but before I could move, you nestled right against my bosom and I laid, rooted to the spot and put our penurious financial problems aside and fell asleep.

I told Charlie about our engagement the following day, he offered lukewarm support and I was more upset about his refusal to show me his true opinion, to speak out, criticize, but Charlie rarely did so. Still I wished he was more like mom had been. Inquisitive, and always inspiring me to think at the most fundamental level. I said my goodbye's to him in one bitter sound bite, and when he clicked — I felt empty.

I looked for you and found you out on our porch. You stood squarely, elegantly bricked like some god to my mortal.

After some 4 minutes of drinking you in, you noticed me and I looked at you expectantly for sympathy. You walked over to me, pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"It's just you and I, we don't need anyone's approval." Your tone imparted a sense of calm in my mind and best of all, you were right.

"We need candidly to chat about how we're going to proceed with the wedding, Edward."

"Yes, I've already managed to get a hold of an old acquaintance willing to stand as witness when we elope." You said, rather unconcernedly. I steadfastly refused to support this as you bypassed me, reclining into a slight worn, grey armchair.

I felt my blood curdle. How could you?

"Edward." You casted a glance at me with a sort of exasperated fixity of expression.

"You made this choice, irrespective of my own feelings. How is this fair?" Indeed I would feel betrayed, the whole idea behind our union was to discuss things together. To be in accordance and you went behind my back and played the sole navigator.

"You want to go through the drudgery of planning a big wedding for the likes of _them_?"

"Then why do I feel a sense of wrongness?"

"You don't have the strength, that's all." You reasoned, with a brick face. I could flail or flow gracefully while you stepped on my toes, but to give you your due, I was always too damn emotional trying hard to keep people close especially those that pulled furthest from me, it was a matter of self-deception. A hollow grasp at desired ends and woe is me that couldn't help it, all I had was you to give it to me straight.

I can truly say, I was often at your defeat.

"I don't say this enough, but you're my only source of potency now."

"I'm only thinking of what's best for you, Bella."


	2. Chapter 2

**I hope you remember me**

**I hope you never pretend for me**

That day our wedding would betide, I slumped over our bed crying in the throes of one of my moods.

You stepped out of the bathroom, wreathed in steam and held me, enfolding me in your warmth that filled me with an ominous sadness for making waves on our special day.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to exacerbate the problem. "

"Cut him loose. It's him. "I saw the hate flare deep in your eyes. "It's Charlie that keeps me from you, Bella." You leaned forward to work the patch of my ear, before you whispered, "Marry me? Please."

My lack of response seemed to inflame you and you aggressively staggered for words that would put this to rest.

"Does he set aside his daily activities to pay you any regulative visits when you're lying sick in the hospital? Does he weep at all for you when you worsen?" You ticked points off on your fingers, as you went, able to say this in matter-of-fact tones. "And lastly, does he pay for any of your god damn medical bills?!" Your eyes went almost as wide as your pupils.

"My family is worst, Bella." You pried your backside from the bed, my pale fingers gripped your arms, rheumy-eyed, and nodded to your line of reasoning as you continued, gesticulating in that vein for another while.

It seemed to me to be anything but comforting for you to have diffused your pain unto mine . I withstood it, for I understood that there was nothing to be gained in arguing. Nothing good would come of it.

My crying desisted and after my puerile episode passed, and my mind was in reasonable order I took to my heels and cleaned up the black mascara rings under my eye pouches.

* * *

"Do you need help?" You walked in, after leaving to indulge in a smoke. It was anathema to me, when you wafted back in cloaked in the scent of nicotine. It turned my stomach.

"You're not suppose to see me, yet." I allowed, thinking of how horrid I presently looked.

"Suppose you tell me why?"

"It's a tradition, If we can't follow any of the others we should at least..." Your thrust a finger to my lips, which sufficed to quiet me.

"I want you to stop. These frivolous traditions have only the worth you give them."

My jaw muscles clenched.

"Now I'll ask again. What can I help you with?" You pressed with a gentler air, while my eyes strayed, landing on the mirror. I dared not to look at you, to see the frustration reflecting in your emerald eyes that I could not relieve.

Was this how a bride was to look like on the day of their wedding? I had no wedding-day-glow, I looked leaden-hued dull — like I was to puke at any moment.

"My dress.." I pointed to the closet, "You can help me with my dress."

You left, returning with a white chiffon V-neckline dress that you weren't pleased with when I showed you.

"Take off your robe." You bade.

I quietly acquiesced. A red flush suffusing my cheeks as I fumbled with the knot on my robe.

You'd seen me naked a hundred times, and yet I felt prodigiously self-conscious under your stare.

"Actually, I can handle it.. "

Your teeth gritted forthwith, and you yanked it down with an animalistic ferocity, ripping it at it's sides.

"Edward!" I covered my exposed breasts. "What the hell is your problem?!"

"Do you see yourself?" You wrested my arms, shaking me powerfully, before tightening your long fingers around my wrists.

"Ow, Edward... _please_.. "

They tightened some more, and with an audible whimper I dropped to my knees.

"Baby. Baby, calm down!" Your strength, it crushed turning my hands a deep purple.

"NO! You are savaging every aspect of this day!"

"I'm so s-sorry," Then they left my flesh, as abruptly as they came.

"I'm j-just feeling a little scared is all." You looked at me with an inscrutable look, before you stepped across the room, your exhalations were loud and slow. "The way you're acting, Bella.." You faced me again and when you walked back over I tensed before you took me by my hands and pressed them to your lips, adorning dry kisses all around my wrists. It hurt more than it soothed.

"It kills me. It's as if you don't love me any more. How have i reaped it?" Watching you hurt, it was a scene that made my heart split in twain.

"I'm sorry. I love you." I croaked. "I love you. I'll be good, Edward."

"I hope so, Bella." You heaved me back to a stand, and proceeded to dress me.


End file.
